Thirsty Suitors
Fair · RPG · 2023
Steam Deck PlayableThe verdict
WAIT.
It has sold at a BANGER price before.
Today
$29.99Fair
On its price record
$6.88BANGER
- Length
- 7.7h
- Value
- $3.89/hr
- Reviews
- 96% positive
Watch this gameOne alert when it is worth buying.
Minimum on the Steam store: 6 GB of memory. Windows only.
Thirsty Suitors is a surreal story-driven game which throws turn-based RPG battles, skating and over-the-top cooking mechanics together in a spicy fusion! This isn't a dating sim - it's a breakup simulator. Battle your exes. Disappoint your parents. Find yourself.
What drives the score
How to read this
Grades run S to D, read from the buyer's side. ▲ marks a lift, ▼ a drag or a dock, ? an input we do not have, • a fact this genre's score does not use. How the grades work
The value story
It has never been cheaper than $14.99. That was November 2025. Its cuts run 34 percent off as a rule. There have been 26 in the 3 years tracked, about 5 weeks apart. No sale on record has reached $6.88, the price it would take to be a BANGER.
Value puts it in the top 9 percent of the games it competes with. It is pricier than 94 percent of its genre, and better reviewed than 96 percent. Among the games that feel like it, Dungeons of Hinterberg ($22.99, scores 76) beats it on value, while it beats Immortals Fenyx Rising ($3.99, scores 34).
Critics scored it 80. Players sit 16 points higher at 96 percent, which usually means a game that plays better than it reviews.
1 of the 230 Steam-purchase reviews sampled here comes from a buyer who refunded the game, sampled from reviews written November 2023 to August 2026.
The drop-off
79% start to 5% rarestNo achievement in this game marks the ending, so there is no finish rate. The curve runs from the most-unlocked achievement to the rarest, and its shape is where players stop. Steam global achievements
Cite this score
Thirsty Suitors scores 60/100 on the BANG Score (fair value) as of Oct 2, 2026. The BANG Score rates what a game is worth for the money. Via Steam BANGERS. https://steambangers.com/game/1617220/thirsty-suitorsReviews set the ceiling, and price against real length moves the BANG Score inside it. How it works, and where it is weak → Steam reviews as of Aug 3, price as of Oct 1.
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